“Oh Rambling Rifleman, we can’t wait to hear your opinion on Avengers: Infinity War” droned some of my more cretinous correspondents last week after noticing that I’ve been absent from the review sphere for due to a crippling case of couldn’t-be-arsed. Of course I could list numerous and well-thought-out reasons as to why Infinity War is just another cog in the great money-printing machine that is the MCU, but what always springs to mind was walking into the cinema to watch A Quiet Place with my other half and finding the atrium literally packed with families, mostly with young kids, all queuing up for tickets to Infinity War, and that was all I needed to know. The Disney-fication process of the superhero film industry is more or less complete now. There’s no target audience for Infinity War, nor will there be complex themes or game-changing cinematics. It’s the Waterloo of the film industry, all these great actors and talents pooling together to completely overwhelm the audience and fans into surrendering all their worldly goods to the great consuming maw that is Disney. So fuck it, I’m going to leave this latest Avengers film hanging like an infinity-gem-encrusted banana and talk about a film that’s actually worth talking about.
Apart from a few clips from The Office and sitting through the PMC wank-fest that is Michael Bay’s 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi, I hadn’t really seen very much of John Krasinski and after 13 Hours was worried that he’d be the new Chris Pratt; a loveable comic actor who sold out and got into shape in order to star in slightly more American action movies. Then, to my pleasant surprise I find that A Quiet Place is both co-written and directed by Krasinski, and considering A Quiet Place is one of the most tense and trouser-soilingly terrifying films I’ve seen in a while, I’d say this is a good step forward for the guy.
From the relatively straightforward premise of humanity being hunted by near-indestructible alien monsters that can only track their prey by sound, A Quiet Place wastes no time in establishing the family’s advantage of having a deaf kid and therefore working knowledge of sign language, something that come in handy for both their survival and for the scriptwriters to not bother writing much in the way of dialogue. I am of course being facetious, because writing silence is just as, if not more effective at creating tension than sound is. And my god does this film pull it off. The opening scene in particular is so quiet your senses become over-heightened, straining to detect any hint of danger or jump-scare. It reminded me of the first time I watched Alien with my other half and she thought there was something wrong with the TV until I said “no, it’s supposed to be that quiet”. As a result the juxtaposition of a loud noise or jump-scare (a device often cited as the horror movie equivalent of the fart joke) is very effective. But what I like most about A Quiet Place is the emphasis on the smaller details, such as using a waterfall to mask an outloud conversation, or the signal fires used to indicate that there are other humans out there who are just as vulnerable as those on film, or setting off a metric shit-ton of fireworks in order to create as much chaos and noise as possible to distract from the monsters.
The monsters themselves are very effectively used, due to Krasinki’s understanding that they are scarier the less we see of them, leading to some fantastically terrifying moments that really showcase the actors line in ‘petrified-finger-on-lips’ expressions. Of course, once we do see the monsters we realise the unfortunate state of monster design in the film industry at large, as the terrifying creatures look like a cross breed of the Cloverfield monster and the Demogorgon from Stranger Things, if the conception was being overseen by a voyeuristic xenomorph. Don’t get me wrong, all three of those buggers are scary on their own, and combining them certainly makes for one ‘orrible bastard of an alien, but I think it speaks volumes that this is what we’ve come to with regard to visual effects.
Truth is there’s very little criticism I can give to A Quiet Place, because the 90 minute run time doesn’t really let me. I could moan about how the daughter is annoying or that the rules of silence are not quite properly defined (so the monsters can detect a creaking floorboard from across half a mile, but a woman giving birth in the same sodding room somehow doesn’t phase them), but these are very minor complaints that I had to work hard to find. The acting is stellar despite the lack of dialogue and even the child actors are worthy of praise. Emily Blunt’s character has some Ellen Ripley levels of badassery towards the end, and the ultimate cliffhanger ending doesn’t feel cheap or unfinished, rather an exciting and satisfying ‘fuck yeah’ as humanity fights back. All in all A Quiet Place is film that inspires hope not just for the horror genre but for the film industry as a whole; a sign that big names can use their influence to promote creative and original concepts rather than squeezing into the next Marvel-branded jumpsuit for the sake of an easy pay-cheque. I’m looking at you, Chris Pratt. And Benedict Cumberbatch. And Paul Bettany. And Martin Freeman. Not to worry though, I’m sure there’ll be more names to add to this list soon enough. Your move Krasinski…
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